A Song of Fiery War Axe & Ice Breaker #24

A WEEKLY SHORT STORY OF YOUR FAVORITE HEARTHSTONE HEROES THRALL AND GARROSH.

Kel’Thuzad was sitting on a sofa in the flying citadel of Naxxramas, watching TV. It was another boring, uneventful day for the lich who hasn’t had much to do in recent times. After all, his role at World of Warcraft was pretty much over and appearances in other titles were rare. All he was left to do was find new hobbies, such as watching anime.

“Hmm… This bunny girl senpai is a top tier waifu” he pondered “I’m going to need to buy the Blu-ray DVD’s when they come out”

Suddenly, the phone rang, which made Kel’Thuzad groan, irritated at the sudden interruption of his favorite show. He paused the television and picked it up while clearing his throat.

“You have reached the Archlich of Naxxramas, Lich Lord of the Plaguelands, Commander of the Dread Necropolis, Master and Founder of the Cult of the Damned, Formerly of the Council of Six, Summoner of Archimonde the Defiler, Betrayer of Humanity, Creator of the Abomination and Majordomo to the Lich King himself…”

Kel’Thuzad paused for a moment, taking a deep breath before finishing his dramatic introduction.

“Kel-Thu-Freaking-Zad!”

A voice of a man was heard on the other side, carrying a thick accent and broken dialect.

“Why yes, hello! I would like to congratulate you, sir! You have won the grand prize of the Nigerian national lottery for 10 million American dollars!”

“10 million!?” Kel’Thuzad gasped, thinking about the amount of anime DVD’s that can be bought for this sum.

“But wait, I’ve never bought a lottery ticket. How could I be a winner?” he wondered.

“Why, that’s because you are super lucky, sir! You are the very lucky winner of 10 million dollars. I called to explain to you how we can send you the money.”

“Wow. That’s great. So how do I receive my 10 million dollars?”

“It’s very easy, sir. You just need to give me your bank account and credit card details, and we’ll send you the money within 14 days.”

“That seems easy enough. Sure!” Kel’Thuzad chuckled, happy to oblige. Over the next couple of minutes, he gave all the information that was asked of him to complete the transaction.

“Great, sir! We’ll be sure to send you the money soon. Have a great day and enjoy the prize!”

The man hung up as Kel’Thuzad fist pumped in excitement.

“10 million dollars! Fantastic.”

Kel’Thuzad pressed the play button to continue watching TV, but a few minutes later, the phone rang again.

“Oh? I wonder if this is the Nigerian lottery committee again”

He answered the phone.

“You have reached the Archlich of Naxxramas, Lich Lord of the Plaguelands, Commander of the Dread Necropolis, Master and Founder of the Cult of the Damned, Formerly of the Council of Six, Summoner of Archimonde the Defiler, Betrayer of Humanity, Creator of the Abomination and Majordomo to the Lich King himself… Kel’Thuzad!”

The voice on the other side was different this time and sounded a bit familiar.

“Greetings, friend. May I interest you in playing the Shaman class in Hearthstone?”

“The Shaman class?” Kel’Thuzad seemed puzzled.

“Yes. According to Vicious Syndicate, Even Shaman is a solid Tier 2 deck with a pretty good matchup spread. It’s quite underrated and underplayed!”

Kel’Thuzad stayed quiet for a few moments, before reaching a realization as to why the voice sounded familiar.

“Wait a minute… Thrall?!?”

“Uhh… Yes.”

“I should have known!” Kel’Thuzad groaned “As if I’m going to fall for your stupid scam. Everyone knows Shaman is boring as hell to play, which is why nobody cares to play your stupid class!”

“But wait, Kel’Thuzad. I’m not making it up, just check the website…”

“How gullible do you think I am?” Kel’Thuzad angrily cut him off.

“But…”

“Goodbye Thrall!” he shouted before hanging up the phone.

“Shaman class in Hearthstone! Hah!”

 


Miss the last episode? Catch up here!