A Song of Fiery War Axe & Ice Breaker #12

A WEEKLY SHORT STORY OF YOUR FAVORITE HEARTHSTONE HEROES THRALL AND GARROSH.

“Garrosh, you finally look confident. I’ve always wanted to see that spark from you again, but are you ready to take ME on?”

“Be careful what you wish for, rogue”

The room’s atmosphere was tense, as both Garrosh and Valeera clicked the play button to enter their match. The only other person in the room was Thrall, who was deep in thought, eager to observe the much anticipated bout.

‘Your class is meta again, Garrosh’ Thrall thought to himself ‘you can finally beat her’.

“NONE WILL SURVIVE!”

As the mulligan phase completed, Baku appeared on the Warrior’s side with its trademark entrance sound. The Warrior’s hero power was now upgraded, which prompted a grin from Garrosh, and a wry smile from Valeera.

“Oh…” the elf giggled “Tank Up is back again! That sure takes me back, Garrosh”

“Yes. You will find it difficult to punch through my armor with your dagger, rogue”

“I do admit that you look far more formidable now, Garrosh.” Valeera continued “but I won’t need to use my dagger much in this matchup”

As she finished her sentence, a ding sound was heard, and a yellow exclamation mark appeared on top of Valeera’s portrait. Garrosh and Thrall gasped in unity, shocked at this turn of events.

“This again?!” Garrosh exclaimed “How do you expect to do well with a card that was nerfed twice?”

Valeera remained quiet, with only a hint of a smile appearing on her lips.

“Garrosh, your removal should be able to deal with 4/4’s.” Thrall interrupted “She can’t burst you down with the amount of armor you can gain. You have to trust your deck to be able to see it through”

Garrosh nodded. Thrall was right. His deck was very effective at removing threats and outlasting repeated onslaughts of aggression. He could do it.

As the match progressed into turn 8, the quest was completed. Garrosh knew it was unavoidable, as his deck was not equipped to pressure the Rogue. His plan was to outlast her threats with his defensive arsenal. Valeera played the Crystal Core quest reward and followed it up with several 4/4’s taking the field.

Garrosh smiled in confidence. His armor count already surpassed 15.

“Watch this, rogue, the new power of the mighty Warrior class!”

Garrosh proceeded to equip a Supercollider, punching one of the Rogue’s minions and removing two threats in one turn. Valeera raised her brow, impressed.

“With this one weapon, I can easily remove 6 of your minions, and you can’t play around it!”

“She’s running out of cards, Garrosh, you got this!” Thrall shouted in excitement.

Valeera giggled in a seductive tone that would have melted the heart of any human in the room, had they been there.

“Indeed, you are a formidable opponent, Garrosh, but what if every single minion I have was doubled?”

With the sound of a click, Valeera the Hollow entered the board, replacing the Rogue’s portrait. Garrosh frowned as Thrall’s expression began to show some concern. He hovered over the Rogue’s remaining deck and saw that 15 cards were still left. Reaching fatigue will be a tough task.

The tense game went on, as Garrosh continued to fend off an increasing amount of threats. His Supercollider punched away, his Mind Control Techs punished any overextension, and when things got hairy, he played Reckless Flurry to wipe the board clean. Despite having her upgraded Death Knight hero power, Valeera was running out of cards again.

‘I’m winning!’ Garrosh encouraged himself in his thoughts ‘This Warrior deck has so many defensive tools, it’s simply unbeatable. I’m back to my old self. Tier 1 here I come!’

As Valeera drew her next card, she sighed and leaned back in her chair.

“Well, Garrosh, it’s been a lot of fun” Valeera spoke in a soft tone “but this is the end of the line”

Garrosh saw a Wax Elemental entering the board, followed by a sound that could haunt his dreams for the next few months.

“SUCH A PERFECT SPECIMEN”

“SUCH A PERFECT SPECIMEN”

“SUCH A PERFECT SPECIMEN”

Garrosh’s posture sank. Thrall gulped nervously. The Rogue has just played 16/16 worth of stats without depleting her hand by a single card thanks to Zola the Gorgon. Garrosh did his best to clear out two minions, but Valeera’s next turn was exactly the same as the last. The two orcs realized it was an infinite value combo.

He hovered over her deck. 10 cards remained. He looked at his hand and noticed it was slowly being depleted of resources. His heart sank as doom crept up into his thoughts.

“SUCH A PERFECT SPECIMEN”

“SUCH A PERFECT SPECIMEN”

“SUCH A PERFECT SPECIMEN”

A few turns later, Garrosh’s hand could no longer offer the removal needed to clear the board. His armor was chunked out as the Rogue approached lethal. There was nothing he could do. With a clenched fist, he conceded the game.

“I… can’t….” were his only words.

“That was a good game, Garrosh. Do not be discouraged.” Valeera offered words of comfort to her opponent.

“How is Quest Rogue good again? Why can’t Team 5 kill this deck for good?” Thrall asked in disbelief, his face covered by his hands.

The Elf chuckled.

“Haven’t you learned by now, Thrall?”

“Valeera always finds a way” Garrosh admitted in defeat.


Miss the last episode? Catch up here!

1 Comment

  1. “SUCH A PERFECT SPECIMEN”
    “SUCH A PERFECT SPECIMEN”
    “SUCH A PERFECT SPECIMEN”

    Truly nightmare fuel

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